So...I didn't get the job.

Hey there my budding squiggle meisters of the world, LittleMissSquiggles here. Remember that job position that I told you guys about last time. Even though I was shortlisted for the position, in the end, sadly I didn’t get it

And I was really disappointed...at first. More so for the fact that I basically wasted an entire holiday slaving away at projects for a job I didn’t get when I could’ve spend my day relaxing like I had planned. That was the major bummer in this case.

But do y’know what I felt afterwards once the disappointment had passed?
RELIEF. Pure, unadulterated relief.

I look at it like, it’s not like I didn’t do a good job nor does losing this opportunity makes me any less of an exceptional artist. It’s more like I just wasn’t the type of person they were looking for. They want someone who not only wants that type of work but is hungry for it. Someone who loves that kind of fast pace, over demanding and pressuring type of job.
That, admittedly, is NOT me. I’m a very relaxed person. I don’t make a fuss. I generally like to go with the flow. I’m not hungry for pressure. Pressure gives me ocular migraines and regular migraines. Pressure makes me sick. I like to take my time to get things done and make sure that they are done right according to my standards. I wouldn’t flourish under conditions like that. If I were to experience that time of pressure on a day to day basis especially as a graphic artist, I’d go crazy.

I would begin to hate the thing that I love and I don’t want that. I don’t want a job where I’m constantly being pressured or don’t have enough time to work on my own projects.

I just wasn’t meant to have that job and y’know c’est la vie. I always tell myself if I could win the lottery tomorrow or inherit a large sum of money that would enable me to take care of myself for the rest of my years on this Earth, I would quit my job in a heartbeat, come home and spend the rest of my days dedicating my life to my craft and inspiring people. I honestly would because that’s what I like to do. That’s my passion and I think everyone can see that in every squiggle that I dish out.

I art because I love doing it. When you begin to put pressure in an area that I love---it takes the fun out of it. So either way, even I had gotten it, I might not have been entirely happy with it, once the real pressure started coming. Not to mention that the difficulty for transportation was another issue. All in all, though I’m saddened that I wasn’t picked for the position, at the same time I’m not completely disappointed.

Now I can relax for the first time in three days. I can SLEEP without worrying about whether or not some big business person would like my work.

I can stop worrying about whether or not I’d get a job I wasn’t 100% sure about getting in the first place.
More importantly, I can finally get back to my projects---doing the things that I love to do and sharing it with all my peeps who look forward to my squiggs.

I didn’t get it because I wasn’t meant to have it. I’m pleased that someone else received the opportunity and I wish this unknown person all the best and I hope they themselves can cope with the pressure. As for myself, I seriously have no idea what fate has in store for me in terms of job opportunities. Thus far 2014 has been a roller coaster ride in terms of that department. All I know is the type of job that I’d like to have and all I can hope is that one day I’ll find one where I truly belong.

Maybe it will be the job that I’m currently working at---(granted that my meanie of a boss would stop bullying me and just let me do what she hired me to do) or maybe it will be something else. For now, I’ll just go with the flow and accept things as they are and continue the look at life with the same relaxed, ‘don’t-give-a-shit’ perspective like I always do.

I can’t change what happened but I can accept it and move on with my life with a giant grin on my face. Something will turn up. I’ll just have to wait a little longer than expected C:
In the interim, it’s comforting to know that I have great support---not just from my family and my peeps in RL but also my friends on the internet. Thank you all SO MUCH for your words of encouragement. Reading all your lovely words and knowing that I have the support from you guys is truly AMAZING. You all are such really wonderful people. Thank you x infinity. As a matter of fact, thank you isn’t even enough---it is NEVER enough to express my endearing gratitude to all you guys.

I love you guys so much. I really do. Thank you for the umpteenth bazillion time.

Regardless of whatever endeavours we may face, let’s all look forward to a positive future together.

~LittleMissSquiggles (2014)